Being Present

   



We just got back from 2 ½ months in America, it was a crazy amazing time of traveling through 8 states. I feel like I dreaded my phone the entire time because I simply wanted to be. Soak up the smiles, the friendships, the convenience, the ocean, the sunshine, the Rita’s gelati, the Seeds Coffee, the efficiency, the rest, soft sheets, clean floors, a hot shower. I wanted to be in every sweet moment. Engaged in every conversation.

   

    It would seem that a common theme often raised in conversation and in my spirit would be how powerful being present really is. It seems like a simple concept, and maybe getting off technology or really paying attention comes to your mind. But I want to take it a step further. Let’s talk about helping the poor (you know that’s what I love to talk about), let’s talk about walking somebody through grief, or reaching somebody we desire to engage. We Americans are problem solvers, we desire to find a way to fix, to bring a solution. That’s why when trying to engage the poor we try to think of some creative outreach to…reach them.

    But what I would argue is much harder to do, but much, much more important, is being present. When our friend is in deep grief, telling them it’ll get better, God has a plan, etc. Isn’t what they need, they need you to be there. Consistently. Be present. The poor, the broken, the excluded want you to be there, in their world, with no agenda. That’s where change will begin.

  

    It’s hard for us to get this idea, because we are almost programed to think of efficient tactics, this almost seems so simple it’s confusing. But when I think back to the past nearly 5 years now in Laos, what the most significant thing I did, was be there. In their village, eating their food, in their homes. I don’t even think I realized it then. And now the product of my relationship and being present is Specialty coffee, and it’s developed alongside them. The organic life-changing conversations that have taken place by listening, discernment and being present has been more fruitful then anything else I could have planned.

 

  I think of how long it’s been since I’ve seen my nieces and nephews. I worry so much that I won’t be there for them, because I’m so far away. That when I am with them I didn’t say the right things, or didn’t do enough. But when we went to the states we got to spend time with all my nieces and nephews, my Farmer, who is a man of few words, definitely took the prize as favorite. But he barely spoke to them. My family kept laughing wondering what his secret was. What we realized is that he would simply abide and be with them. They loved him for it. They would take his hand, dress him up and share their stories and he would sit patiently and listen. He would be. For them, that was what they wanted. Not somebody asking what their favorite color was, or who they wanted to be over and over.

   

    I am really learning what this means in my life here more and more. To not get frustrated when things don’t get done how I want them to or people don’t make the choices I feel they should. Simply be where they are, meet them where they’re at. I have come home from the land of clean and quick, to the land of dirty and slow pace. We have fleas in our bed, our once white pillows are black. The electrical sockets keep melting, there is no room to put our things, mud is everywhere. My knee-jerk reaction is to be frustrated at everyone and everything. To crawl into my little 5x7 ft. space and be alone. But that will only make me miserable, and the people feel disdained. I’m attempting to be completely present in this way of life again. To embrace it, to change small things that are necessary, and leave the rest.

   As for the people, I need to listen, be consistently there. Things for us are beginning to pick up, with coffee and paperwork, this needs to be something we fight for more and more. And I know in America there is such a busy, hustle and bustle to life where we rely so much on our phones for communication and work. But in this day of efficiency and convenience let’s push to being present to those who need us. To our friends, and family. So today, stand still for a moment. Listen completely to the person who is talking to you, stop looking at your watch….be there. See what fruit comes of it.