Gratitude

    Oh graduation week. Your stuck between being so ready to be done, then never wanting to leave college. So many feelings have been pumping through all our hearts. It seemed kind of perfect timing that my roommate got married. This past saturday I got the honor of being apart of Doc’s wedding. Our Adobe House of girls is minus one. But as we stood and watched her walk down that isle, a glowing bride, all you could do was catch your breath. You couldn’t feel sorrow when you saw the love they held for each other, or the groom’s awe when he beheld his bride, or their reverence for the One they both loved each other for.

   
We had just been in the ocean (an hour and a half before she walked down the isle), one of our favorite places. Doc caught a perfect wave and we carried her off the beach, being as obnoxious as possible.  Her and I cried in the bathroom as she put on her lacey wedding dress and a crown of flowers, and I couldn’t help just being so grateful. So grateful for the time I got to live with this wonderful sister. So grateful for all the things she taught me. For the dark times we helped each other through and the joyful times. The dance parties, paint wars, dumpster diving, surfing adventures.

   
Two hours later we were all dancing in a field. Almost giddy with joy. I looked around me. It was finals week. My last one ever, after this many of us would move away. But this moment, we were here. We were celebrating a covenant that you can’t witness without experiencing the Great Lion. I really felt as I caught my breath from the dancing and laughing, this is just a taste of heaven. I looked at Doc glowing, pure and beautiful being a perfect picture of what The Vine thinks of us. 

Fast forward to tonight. Tonight we were honored by two people that have poured into us girls so intentionally for the past four years, and have been at the center of many of my fondest memories. The couple cooked us a delicious meal, even did silly accents as they served us. But then we started sharing memories. We were the first group of college kids they have seen from beginning to end. But they were so much more then just leaders. They were a safe haven, when you had no where else to go. They were a listening ear, they were genuine and transparent, they were people who would spend hours doing one small thoughtful thing for you. They were people who believed in me. I got sappy and cried again, because I was just so grateful. I felt like I should feel something different or say something more, but all I could do was let the tears roll and the heart overflow.

 
 I firmly believe I am not worthy of many things. I am not worthy for the wonderful education I have received at my college. I am not worthy to have been loved the way I have been loved by the community in which I live. I am not worthy of my roommates and sisters. I am not worthy of my family’s loyalty and patience. I am not worthy to know My Farmer and call him mine. I am not worthy to call his people my people. I am most unworthy of blood that was spilled for me a long time ago. But all I can do is have a grateful heart and let my cup overflow and spill out onto the world.

    So for all my seniors graduating college, or anyone saying goodbye to a season of life and getting ready for the next. Don’t grieve too long, be grateful, and receive it. I am about to get my degree and not be in a school anymore for the first time since I was five. I might feel like a fish out of water, but I’m beginning to be excited for the next. I’m in that process of putting on those hiking boots, getting ready for the next journey, the Lion’s roar beckoning me onward.